Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Excuses excuses

He came into the lecture after an hour, frazzled yet unapologetic. "Sorry, I just saw the weather and decided to have a lie in."

"It's 5 o'clock," I replied.

"I know. I got up at 2. I just couldn't have been arsed going out, you know? I promise I'll be on time for the rest of the lectures."

I laughed.

"You won't, though."

"Yeah, I know."

I thought of all the other excuses I've had for tardiness over the years...

"I've just worked an 18 hour shift down the mines."
"I had a fight with a bus conductor."
"I wanted to be here but the house next door went on fire so myself and the lads had to go and get drunk."
"I fell over a pencil and hurt my back."
"'Neighbours' was on."
"I was part of an intervention and time got away from me."
"My sister accidentally swallowed my brother."
"Earth Hour caught me off guard, I don't know whether I'm coming or going."

...and I figured this lad deserves an A for honesty.

Still didn't let him sign the attendance sheet though. I'm a Nazi like that.


Twenty Major said...

What are you teaching?

Radge said...

Sports Journalism. Thank fuck for those Teacher's Editions.

Dot-Com said...

You're cruel! If I was in your class, I think I'd be late every time just to see what you'd say. Well, I'd try to be late. Probably wouldn't manage.

Conan Drumm said...

Given the course I reckon you should allow substitutions and have extra time.

So yer man's now on a yellow card?

Radge said...

Yeah, not quite a bookable offence but I'm keeping my eye on him.

Holemaster said...

So that's where it starts. The insolent pup.

This-Limbo said...

He gets an A in my book. Insolence like that should be rewarded. He'll go far.

Radge said...

Holemaster - I once wanted to be that insolent pup, but I was too lazy to be so lazy.

Regina - I agree. There's a future banker inside him.

McMuck and the Mystery of the Kuúgleflarg said...

"Sorry Mr Lecturer...

"Went out drinking last night, headed back to one of the lad's gaff, bunked down on the couch, crept loudly upstairs to try and de-duvet said lad with the aid of a dastardly accomplice, he held onto his dignity with the whites of his finger-nails, went to sleep, woke up this morning raging hangover...

"And that's why I'm late."

Would you let me sign the attendance sheet?

Radge said...

After that attempted sodomy? Not a chance.

Deviatrix said...

Now if he'd been successful at the auld sodomy he'd be..er..in?