Tuesday, November 24, 2009

80 minutes

My worst class.

I felt well prepared beforehand, notes demonstrating how major sporting events can instigate societal changes using the 1995 Rugby World Cup in South Africa as the best example. Mandela and all that.

I also had last week as leverage and the killer opening line as the class simmered down to a gathered hush.

"So, quiet week in sport. Nothing to see here."

It got the requisite laugh and I asked them all to commit their thoughts on the Ireland match itself, coupled with the media response, to paper. Some good impromptu pieces but it left me with an hour and a half to kill and the ill-will to switch to the rugby topic.

It all went so-so until my monumental fuck up.

"So, you see that when Mandela mentioned the fact that he was more tense before this iconic rugby game than at any other stage in his life, it was because this event, this 70 minutes, was the tipping point of all that he had strived for throughout his..."

I heard some sniggering and immediately realised what I'd said.

"80 minutes. Fuck. 80 minutes. I was thinking of... I'm tired. It's the weather. It's... Oh shut up. No you shut up..."

My cover blown, I let them off early, waiting until they'd left the room to take a long and hard look at my reflection in the window. Soul searching completed I legged it, got into a taxi and caught the end of the Liverpool match. More humiliation and not a drop of whiskey in the flat.

7 comments:

Therese Cox said...

That's a golden opportunity to crack the old "Oh, I was just testing to see if you were paying attention" chestnut. That failing, nothing wrong with embracing one's 80 minutes of infamy. Far more endearing than those much-hullaballoed 15 minutes of fame.

Hope the whiskey worked out for you, in the end.

Radge said...

Nah, no whiskey. Just a quick game of darts on the DS and then sweet slumber.

JD aka Fakey said...

GCD - it's the place to be

McMuck and the Mystery of the Kuúgleflarg said...

"So, quiet week in sport. Nothing to see here."

Killer line.

I will use that one myself tomorrow.

Radge said...

Thieving gypsy.

NaRocRoc said...

That right there is karma I'm afraid. All your rugby taunts and mocking coming back to bite you in t'hole. Let it be a lesson to us all.

But it's still okay to resent rugby tho.

Radge said...

Fuckin' karma.

Fuckin' handball.