Thursday, September 10, 2009

Just don't accredit me

I've been asked to write a guest blog somewhere, elsewhere, on the intersphere.

"Write anything you want! Go mad! No football though," I was telt in terms not uncertain.

Now that's all very well until all manner of ideas start jumbling into my head at stupid o'clock in the morning, forcing me computer-wards when - in some parallel sex life - I'd be doing appalling things to and/or with Zooey Deschanel.

(Yes, her again and no, I won't get over it anytime soon.)

I had a fucking great idea for this guest blog about an hour and a half ago, which coincided with 5.30 in the morning. I got up, brushed my teeth, put on a pot of coffee, checked my email and opened up Word.

If you saw, if you could only SEE the garbled load of nonsensewank that came frightened from my fingers. It was pish.

However, I will persist. You'll have your guest blog, unidentified mysterion, you'll have your guest blog.

Just don't accredit me.

Thanks.

17 comments:

PRyin said...

Givvus a read of the nonsense.
Ah go on.

Radge said...

Oh you won't see it here, PRyin...

ieatmypigeon said...

I often sleep-write, only to wake up and find that it's drivel. I've an article deadline today and went to bed set on one topic but dreamed that I was supposed to write about women who can't conceive instead. I woke depressed and panicked because I know nothing about that topic. Then I realized that I'm supposed to be writing about Guatemala City instead.

Terence McDanger said...

You're one of those people who records voice memos into dictaphones they fish out from their inside pocket at annoying intervals.

Aren't you? Yeah. You are.

Radge said...

I did my thesis on Guatemalan women who can't conceive, funnily enough.

Terence - This feels like a dream where I wake up to find you having a shower. If you get me.

adogwoof said...

Guatemalan women rock

Meadow said...

Ehm, I ate the twix... But I'll buy you another nicer one. Thank you!

And Terence? Did I see Terence or am I experiencing visual disturbance due to a sugar rush?

Radge said...

Yes, yes, he is very much back. Leaving comments all over the place he is.

And thanks Meadow. You know how I love a Twix.

Terence McDanger said...

Radge I've just read your last few months' back catalogue. That's dedication right there, true fandom.

The chick lit one was class.

The rest....meh...not so much.

(I'm joking you cock).

Radge said...

Cheers Terence. There's a mutual acquaintance who said the same about the chick lit piece. Tall lad from the south east. You know him. Likes an ale.

Red Leeroy said...

ahh where is this http:// ?

Radge said...

Meadow's blog, Red. I abandoned the initial idea and went for something a bit less risqué, so the cat's out of the bag.

Elmo said...

Zooey Deschanel has changed, somehow she looked older in Almost Famous (even though she was younger). I didn't recognise her from the picture you put up.

Radge said...

Surprised to learn she's only 29.

Holemaster said...

Good work Mr. X

Conan Drumm said...

What? Your readers demand the risqué, soonest. Perhaps Mr X could forward it as a missive to 'Ask Radge'?

Radge said...

Cheers Holemaster.

Conan - It will be my masterpiece, not going to waste it on you shower!