My second day waking up to unemployment, my second day waking up hungover (though mildly in today's case) to unemployment. I'm checking the post at ten minute intervals for my letter of redundancy so I can go and meet my new friends in the dol.. in the Jobseekers Allowance emporium.
Oh what magical things happen there. I can only imagine. Put me near a ticketing machine and watch me grow giddy at the knees.
I cancelled the dentist. One hundred and forty notes is better off in my pocket in the here and the now, I can't be doing with the scraping neither. DZZZZZZZ... (you should be looking for a job, not sweating bloody gums all over this man's nice non-latex gloves).... DRRRRRRNNNNGGG... (he said something there but I can't hear him because he's drilling throughout my face).
Not for me. I'll go back when I'm financially viable.
Also coming to the fore is my love of 'too soon' jokes. A fella in the pub on Tuesday offered me the coppers from his pocket. Owen showed up last night with a bottle of Cava that has still gone unpopped. The rest of the gags I pre-empted myself, the best of which...
Johnny, looking in my cupboard: "You don't seem to have any..."
Me, quick as something quick: "Job?"