Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme

Please, don't all applaud at once, I have some news.

I am going to marry Elaine Robinson.

I am. I'm driving up to Berkeley tomorrow and I'm going to marry Elaine Robinson, I am going to propose to her and nobody can stop me. Not my parents and their Rotary Club set, not her father and his pungent cigars.

Not her deprived little sexcat of a mother, all vodka and lost promise. No. No I say. Elaine will be mine.

I'm going to rent a nice little room on Carter Street and mind my own business, mind my own business all the way into old Elaine's heart and steal her away from Carl Smith. He's a mighty fine walker, the old make-out king, but he can't regale her as I do.

This plan isn't half baked, it's fully baked, I'm driving to Berkeley tomorrow to make Elaine Robinson mine and, you know, it might just work. I've got pluck aplenty.

12 comments:

Meadow said...

Best of pluck, Benjamin!

Terence McDanger said...

I couldn't smile wide enough.

**Runs**

Flann O'Coonassa said...

Radge, I just wanted to say best of luck, and that we're all counting on you. Go get her, champ.

BUT...if it doesn't work out, know that we will brand you a failure and fully expect you to decommission this blog. The blogging community does not -- I repeat, does not -- tolerate failure.

Radge said...

Meadow - Thanks, I'm currently waiting for the emotional 'will she/won't she' Scarborough Fair interlude. She's stll pretty fucked off I rode her ma.

Terence - You're a dead man for that.

Flann - As if I wasn't feeling nervous enough.

Conan Drumm said...

"Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme"?


You're all about the stuffing, aren't you?

Radge said...

Conan - No. I'm all about the pluck.

Maxi Cane said...

I Googled Elaine Robinson and got

THISLet us know how it went.

Radge said...

Maxi - Time has ravaged her once elfin looks.

Maxi Cane said...

Yeah, so has the ugly stick.

Red Leeroy said...

What will you be listening to in the car on the way up there ?

Radge said...

I'm thinking 'Mama' by the Spice Girls. I really should have left by now.

Flann O'Coonassa said...

Ah, Mama by the Spice Girls, that underrated gem. Regarded as the best Lennon and McCartney song ever not written by Lennon and McCartney (Lennon has been dead nearly 30 years, and McCartney, while involved, subsequently disowned the project when they took out his accordion solo).