Thursday, April 16, 2009

The miser

Not all taxi drivers are cunts. It's true. They're not.

Of course, this runs contrary to a recent blog where I wished death upon one member of the species, but tonight I met the Jekyll to his Hyde, or the Hyde to his Jekyll as it's late and I forgot the one from the other.

I finished up at 11 and fled to Townsend Street, thence on to the quays. I hailed down this fella and he regaled me with stories of supporting St Pat's and having Kevin Doyle in his car.

I phoned in my interest, wanting no conversation and a sleepy seven minute trip of silence and the inevitable Q102.

We got to my road and I padded myself down for my wallet. Nothing. Not a sign. An empty pocket save for a Bus Eireann ticket stub and some chewing gum.

He told me this happened all the time and he could tell the 'genuine from the chancers, Bud.'

I had six euro in change, a fiver shortfall, but he let me off. He wouldn't even take my number and off he went.

Straight away and the flat ravaged open for the card company number. Only at this point did I remember there was an interweb ripe for the scouring and that was that.

I probably just left it on my desk in work, as I needed something to throw when that Portuguese haircut lashed one in from forty yards and more.

P.S. Don't worry about me tapping you up for a few bob. Before writing this message I counted out twenty euro in shiny 20p pieces. Miser is as misery does.

14 comments:

Niamh B said...

Heartwarming... Not sure where you'll cash the 20 p pieces however?! - all those little engravings of horses are nice to have though, I'm sure

Red Leeroy said...

how dare that nice bastard, you got the plate number radge, right?, right?

Dot-Com said...

At least you'll be paying your bus fare in 20p pieces and not 1 or 2p pieces... Or so I hope!

Radge said...

Niamh - The bakery next door is my best bet.

Red - I plan to lodge a complaint to the Stereotype Deviation Authority.

Dot - A couple of 50s in there, so I'm grand.

Terence McDanger said...

I got a Nigerian gentleman the other night who taught me the nuances of keeping one's woman in check.

Apparently you threaten to leave her and then call the cops when she goes mental over it, after that, she's putty in your hands.

I would have written this in the blog but it was already too long so I had to take an editorial decision.

Radge said...

Terence - So you've used me instead. Nice.

Maxi Cane said...

You're an awful bollix, I got a taxi and the driver wasn't impressed at all, my fare cost me an extra fiver because "Some cunt stiffed me earlier, and it has to be made up somewhere"

Radge said...

Maxi - I am a jammy fucker alright.

NaRocRoc said...

For having to listen to Q102 we should get a fiver discount anyway methinks.

Meadow said...

Can I have a loan?

Radge said...

Meadow - We'll need to establish a good line of credit first.

Holemaster said...

Anything but the Adrian Kennedy moan show.

B said...

You didn't even give him the chewing gum?!

Susan said...

Lucky you--got away with a fiver and didn't even have to kiss him for it?

Sorry to hear you were wallet-less however; sorry again about the play.