I told myself before that I wouldn't write a post about the search terms people use to get here, but I like to tell myself little untruths from time to time and I'm wondering who the fuck googled 'Andrea Corr ear infection' and happened upon my stylings?
Which sad soul was so engulfed by his or her mid-life crises that they looked for 'fifty good things about being fifty'?
I must apologise to this person, I'm twenty years shy of it and, if memory serves me correctly (I'm too lazy to look back at my old posts) it was mostly just about cheese and pints.
Somebody e-searched 'peh peh peh.' That one was probably 5X, we decided one Stephen's Green afternoon to replace the generic 'la la la' of too many Britpop staples with 'peh peh peh'. Tunelessness for tunelessnesses sake.
Many, many times people click on Radgery thinking it to be a paean to Johnson, Mooney and O'Brien advertisements. Alas, no.
'She never calls first.' Holy fuck. That sounds curiously, to me, like mid-noughties Radge, before the facelift and the counselling sessions.
'Calling doctor by first name.' This is another regular on my stat counter. Obviously I hit on something there. A tip - it's ok, folks, call her or him what you like. You're paying fifty euro for the privilege.
'Skinny latté pilates.'
'Morning ice breakers.' Do the elephant. That's always a conversation starter.
We have an illiterate seeking 'www.tom and gery.com,' and we have a few searches for 'Barry Egan Sunday Independent' (probably himself).
Somewhat queerly, someone's seeking out pictures of 'Beyonce fucking Lucas Leiva' and another blindfolded themselves, randomly hit the keys and magicked 'Beyonce fucking Beyonce' and neither of these two searches involved the necessary accent on the second 'é' in the girating gobshite's name.
Someone, soon to be everyone, went for 'no work today' and then there was my favourite of the whole bunch.
'Who is the original singer of nothing going to change my love for you.'
They forgot the question mark at the end.