I forget what it's like to work.
I really do.
I'm still checking in on my work email, as I receive the odd personal mail on that, and the other day found a work missive detailing changes to work practices, gripes, suggestions and all sorts of such things.
It made my head hurt.
The idea of getting up before 9am, falling asleep standing under the shower, shaving (I've grown the mother of all stubbly beards), getting my coffee voucher stamped, sitting at my work computer and painstakingly editing, copying, pasting and tweaking all day is enough to drive me to distraction.
Thankfully, I'm still six or seven weeks away from such drudge, but this is the life for me. I've still to settle into any kind of routine given my travels, but an average day would be thus...
11am: Arise after ten hours of sweet slumber.
11.03am: Turn on television to Sky Sports News. I will see the same stories on rotation roughly eight times.
11.12am: Internet - email, Football 365, the blogs (Rosie and Terence, then onwards), Facebook, job sites (which quickly scare me).
12.20pm: Check phone for eighth time (it's been on silent). No messages. Everyone at work.
12.30pm: Shop. I've run out of cheese and toilet roll and Weetabix.
12.51pm: Catch the last few minutes of Frasier and hope that there's a fresh episode at 1pm.
1pm: Fresh episode of Frasier.
1.30pm: Fresh episode of Frasier.
2pm: Back to Sky Sports News. Internet. Bowl of cereal.
2.20pm: Wonder if I should go into town.
2.21pm: Decide not to go into town, have nap instead.
3.13pm: Wake from nap, see missed calls from Private Number with no message. Become frustrated.
3.14pm: Stare into space.
3.50pm: Realise I've been staring into space for over half an hour. Check email. Three new emails. All promotional messages from Aer Lingus.
4.01pm: Put on DVD.
4.51pm: Pause DVD to check email and realise I have a problem.
5.55pm: DVD finishes. Proper dinner or toasted cheese sandwich? Choose latter.
6.16pm: Note smell from clothes and armpits.
6.30pm: Get dressed. Phone Johnny.
7.21pm: Call over to Johnny. Commence drinking.
9:55pm: Ferryman. Get destroyed.
11:35pm: Head for Doyles. Destroyeder.
1:45am: Home. Toasted cheese sandwich or cereal? Choose latter.
It's a full life.